No Pain, No Gain is a tried and tested saying that people say regularly when they put in blood, sweat, and tears to seeing their dream become more than a dream.
When coach puts you through three more minutes of non-stop sprints? No pain, no gain. When you’re struggling to put in that last rep as your muscle gives out? No pain, no gain. When every fiber of your body is screaming for rest, what do you say to yourself as you try and become a better version of yourself? No pain, no gain. Risk it for the biscuit, this one drunk girl at a party once told me.
I’m excited for this holiday. You have no idea. People ask, what’s your favorite holiday? Most usually say Christmas, because, duh.
I usually have an internal debate between Christmas and Thanksgiving as my two favorite. Ultimately though, I still choose Christmas because I like Christmas trees. Thanksgiving only falls behind a small margin. Then Halloween, because you get to get sloshed in a Thomas the Tank Engine outfit and eat handfuls of Kit Kat. Win, win.
But what’s so awesome about thanksgiving you may ask? Don’t you mean GAINSGIVING, BRO?? Yes, I just turned a somber pilgrim holiday into a fitness meme. Gainsgiving is the shit, and not because of what’s coming out of your body after all that pumpkin pie.
All gains are made that day, that fateful day when your family deems it acceptable to fill up your body with high calorie foods and not feel ashamed of it afterwards. But how does it relate to that no pain, no gain schmeil I was spitting out earlier?
A lot of people think gains are made in the gym. I say nay. They happen in the kitchen. Where you girls should be...or you guys...ok look, everyone should be in the kitchen. Because there is food there.
You might be able to go hard in the gym, but if you are not eating more calories than you burn ,then the mass you are trying to put on or the muscles you are trying to build won’t rebuild as effectively then if you did have the proper fuel. The true pain to get gains dosen’t come from the P.R bench, it comes from stuffing your face with so much food that your stomach bulges and you feel like throwing up. That’s the true pain, in the pursuit of gains. If you eat more than you what is socially acceptable, then you will get gains that is more than socially acceptable.
That’s why then I say to all you athletes, enjoy this Gainsgiving. Gains will be graciously bestowed upon you with the abundance of heavy laden foods that will grace your dinner table. This will be the only day out of the whole year where friends and family will provide a meal for the potluck instead of skimping through and getting a platter of cookies from King Soopers.
I might be diverting off topic, but the point of this post is...enjoy today. You’ll be with your family and friends, and you’ll be gorging yourself to the point where you can no longer move and it hurts to sit up. Today will be the day for all you meatheads to start “bulking season” and I salute you.
Happy Gainsgiving, for much gains will be given tonight. Give thanks to the gaining, and eat your sexy ass hearts out tonight.